Strangers on a Pier: Portrait of a Family
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- Create Date：2023-01-21 06:54:00
- Update Date：2025-09-06
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- Author：Tash Aw
- ISBN：0008421277
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Summary
'So wise and so well done。 It made me wish it were much longer than it is’ Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie
From the award-winning author of Five Star Billionaire and We， The Survivors comes a whirlwind personal history of modern Asia， as told through his Malaysian and Chinese heritage。
If we are lucky we will find writing that grips us with its vitality， beauty and significance - Strangers on a Pier is like that’ Deborah Levy
In Strangers on a Pier， acclaimed author Tash Aw explores the panoramic cultural vitality of modern Asia through his own complicated family story of migration and adaptation， which is reflected in his own face。 From a taxi ride in present-day Bangkok， to eating Kentucky Fried Chicken in 1980s Kuala Lumpur， to his grandfathers' treacherous boat journeys to Malaysia from mainland China in the 1920s， Aw weaves together stories of insiders and outsiders， images from rural villages to megacity night clubs， and voices in a dizzying variety of languages， dialects， and slangs， to create an intricate and astoundingly vivid portrait of a place caught between the fast-approaching future and a past that won't let go。
From the award-winning author of Five Star Billionaire and We， The Survivors comes a whirlwind personal history of modern Asia， as told through his Malaysian and Chinese heritage。
If we are lucky we will find writing that grips us with its vitality， beauty and significance - Strangers on a Pier is like that’ Deborah Levy
In Strangers on a Pier， acclaimed author Tash Aw explores the panoramic cultural vitality of modern Asia through his own complicated family story of migration and adaptation， which is reflected in his own face。 From a taxi ride in present-day Bangkok， to eating Kentucky Fried Chicken in 1980s Kuala Lumpur， to his grandfathers' treacherous boat journeys to Malaysia from mainland China in the 1920s， Aw weaves together stories of insiders and outsiders， images from rural villages to megacity night clubs， and voices in a dizzying variety of languages， dialects， and slangs， to create an intricate and astoundingly vivid portrait of a place caught between the fast-approaching future and a past that won't let go。
Reviews
Samuel
，
Familiar， evocative， quite moving
Noelle
，
It was a lovely read， and I really resonate to the 3rd culture kid， being in different countries， children of South East Asian immigrant perspective; also makes me feel connected to my life when I lived in Singapore。 Feels like a long personal diary entry - if you're interested in those types of stories， it'd be a good read。 It was a lovely read， and I really resonate to the 3rd culture kid， being in different countries， children of South East Asian immigrant perspective; also makes me feel connected to my life when I lived in Singapore。 Feels like a long personal diary entry - if you're interested in those types of stories， it'd be a good read。 。。。more
Kristel
，
Een verzameling van losse anekdotes， die een beeld geven van hoe de auteur ， als Oost-Aziatische immigrant， terugkijkt op zijn familiale geschiedenis， vergelijkt met zijn studiegenoten， en mede-immigranten。 Leuk om lezen， vlot， leerzaam。 Soms moet je wat moeite doen om te snappen wie de personages zijn in een betreffende anekdote， en ik miste enige chronologie of opbouw in de rode draad。 Vandaar 3 sterren en geen 4。
Luke
，
Another book plucked on a whim from the shelves at work， although I already had a feeling I would enjoy this from the cover alone。 A fractured memoir of a family history， combining elements of biography and cultural-historical analysis to paint a portrait of a people connected by complex threads of culture， language， food， family and shared history。 I’ve never read the work of Ocean Vuong， but something tells me that fans of his particular style of writing would get a lot from this。
Soha
，
4。5 🌟Brilliant and so relatable！！
Maria
，
This book is a memoir， an intergenerational story and an essay at the same time。 It's also one of those rare books that manage to pack entire worlds in very few pages。 It touches on immigration， identity， family， intergenerational （non） communication， collective memory， society， class， and race， and it manages to do so in under 100 pages， without ever feeling superficial。I believe the author managed to do so thanks to the clarity he approaches these themes with， and his writing， which is purpose This book is a memoir， an intergenerational story and an essay at the same time。 It's also one of those rare books that manage to pack entire worlds in very few pages。 It touches on immigration， identity， family， intergenerational （non） communication， collective memory， society， class， and race， and it manages to do so in under 100 pages， without ever feeling superficial。I believe the author managed to do so thanks to the clarity he approaches these themes with， and his writing， which is purposeful and evocative， and manages to capture readers and hold them in until the last page。 。。。more
Nadia
，
Deze familiekroniek is een kleinood om te koesteren : de mijmeringen van Tash Aw deden me zelf ook stil staan bij mijn eigen familiegeschiedenis en mijn onwetenheid hierover。 Vaak ben je nog te jong wanneer hierover wordt verteld en tegen dat je zelf oud genoeg bent om hierover bewust vragen te stellen， zijn de betrokkenen vaak al overleden waardoor er een hoop onduidelijk en onbeantwoord blijft。 Ik zag ook een aantal parallellen in de generatie grootouders （geboren na WO1）， ouders （geboren tijd Deze familiekroniek is een kleinood om te koesteren : de mijmeringen van Tash Aw deden me zelf ook stil staan bij mijn eigen familiegeschiedenis en mijn onwetenheid hierover。 Vaak ben je nog te jong wanneer hierover wordt verteld en tegen dat je zelf oud genoeg bent om hierover bewust vragen te stellen， zijn de betrokkenen vaak al overleden waardoor er een hoop onduidelijk en onbeantwoord blijft。 Ik zag ook een aantal parallellen in de generatie grootouders （geboren na WO1）， ouders （geboren tijdens WO2） en kleinkinderen en tussen de 1ste generatie migranten in België en de volgende generaties : toenemende opleidingsgraad die voor verwijdering zorgt， de ambitie van de ouders dat hun kinderen het beter hebben dan zijzelf，…Een boekje van amper 103 bladzijden， absoluut de moeite waard om te lezen ！ 。。。more
Fred L。
，
interessante zuidoostaziatische kijk op Chinees-zijn， migratie， roots， social progress
Hani Batrisya
，
Finished this in the train on the way to work today and I nearly bawled。 Beautifully written work。
isa
，
All that is broken must remain in the past。I cannot find any words to accurately express how much this book means to me。 Tash Aw writes so beautifully about what it's like to be a citizen of a country that will forever see you as an immigrant。 It's about generational trauma and institutional racism。 But it's also about something more。 It's also about family， pain and love and how that can take shape in silence and playful denials。 All that is broken must remain in the past。I cannot find any words to accurately express how much this book means to me。 Tash Aw writes so beautifully about what it's like to be a citizen of a country that will forever see you as an immigrant。 It's about generational trauma and institutional racism。 But it's also about something more。 It's also about family， pain and love and how that can take shape in silence and playful denials。 。。。more
Leon
，
"Next time， granny。 Next time。" "Next time， granny。 Next time。" 。。。more
Krutika Puranik
，
A book of under 100 pages that speaks volumes is such a rarity。 And Tash Aw's memoir of his family is one such marvel。 Tracing his family's roots， Aw speaks of how it feels like to be an immigrant even decades later。 Not only does he cover his grandparents' journey to the Malay Peninsula and how they had to adapt in a new place but he also speaks about living with a face that both belongs and also makes one ask where he's from。It's the second part of the book that I truly loved reading， in which A book of under 100 pages that speaks volumes is such a rarity。 And Tash Aw's memoir of his family is one such marvel。 Tracing his family's roots， Aw speaks of how it feels like to be an immigrant even decades later。 Not only does he cover his grandparents' journey to the Malay Peninsula and how they had to adapt in a new place but he also speaks about living with a face that both belongs and also makes one ask where he's from。It's the second part of the book that I truly loved reading， in which he speaks about his grandmother。 There's something very moving about the way he writes about her upbringing。 There's a lot to unpack from this short memoir， making one ponder over their own roots。 This book reminded me of a short post that I wrote a year ago about carrying certain traits that once belonged to our parents and grandparents。The writing is exceptional， flawless and so wholesome。 Tash Aw's words will probably stay with me for a very long time， like how I treasure fallen flowers between the pages of a book。 I can't recommend this book enough。 And I can't wait to read more by @tash。aw 🍂 。。。more
Horatio
，
Having read "The Face: Strangers on a Pier"， which was Tash Aw's other book with roughly the same title， I assumed that this book would be an extension of that one， or a long-form version of that short book。 As such， I happily placed my order on Amazon for this book， but I was quite disappointed when it arrived because much of the book was actually repeated from The Face。 This collection （also rather sparse， about 120 pages） consists of 2 short stories: the first is almost identical to the one i Having read "The Face: Strangers on a Pier"， which was Tash Aw's other book with roughly the same title， I assumed that this book would be an extension of that one， or a long-form version of that short book。 As such， I happily placed my order on Amazon for this book， but I was quite disappointed when it arrived because much of the book was actually repeated from The Face。 This collection （also rather sparse， about 120 pages） consists of 2 short stories: the first is almost identical to the one in The Face， and the second one is about his grandmother。 Both stories were phenomenal， with lots of poignant insights and relatable content， though the first one is slightly better than the second。 In the second story， however， Aw again showcased his ability to tease out the hardship and suffering of his grandmother's life and to present it so clearly。 Despite only having read his non-fic， Tash Aw is fast becoming one of my favourite Asian authors。 This collection did not disappoint， and was worth the money despite me only getting half of what I paid for （cos of the recycled first story， but that's on me）。 For my review of The Face， see https://www。goodreads。com/review/show。。。。 。。。more
Jacqueline
，
Juweeltje， dit boek。Zo mooi， kwetsbaar en klein geschreven。
Lim
，
Moving and heartwarming。 An honest reflection of a family’s history。 Reminds me of my grandparents。
Anthony Frobisher
，
Uncommon Identity A moving and thoughtful memoir of immigration， identity， family and societal expectations in Malaysia， through the eyes of Tash Aw。 The pain of separation while families migrate， relocate， seek work， seek to provide a future for their children。 Beautifully written。
John
，
𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬 & 𝐮𝐬 & 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐟𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬I put off writing a review of this memoir weeks after finishing it not simply because I’ve been in a reading-and-reviewing slump， but it’s mostly because this is a personal read， one that hit home。 There is no way I’m going to talk about everything here for， one， there is so much to unpack， it is an impossible， fated-to-be-futile task ; two， doing so wouldn’t do justice to Mr。 Aw’s incandescent and humane writing。 In fact， the only way to achieve that is pic 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬 & 𝐮𝐬 & 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐟𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬I put off writing a review of this memoir weeks after finishing it not simply because I’ve been in a reading-and-reviewing slump， but it’s mostly because this is a personal read， one that hit home。 There is no way I’m going to talk about everything here for， one， there is so much to unpack， it is an impossible， fated-to-be-futile task ; two， doing so wouldn’t do justice to Mr。 Aw’s incandescent and humane writing。 In fact， the only way to achieve that is picking the book up。 Made up of two essays， this memoir focuses on diasporic experience and identity of Malaysian Chinese。 Of forebears who strive to succeed in the new， foreign motherland by overcoming hardships， discriminations， and homesickness。 Of their descendants whose access to education and different worldviews gives them a hard time and/or make it impossible to sympathise with their ancestors’ pasts and histories。 Thus， an ever present chasm between them。 Of class privileges reserved for middle-to-upper community members， which discussion presents a bitingly， convincingly frank polemic against the homogeneity of Malaysian Chinese who is often claimed to be an all-affluent ethnic group。 Especially striking and touching is the second essay titled “Swee Ee or Eternity，” in which memories shared by the author and his maternal grandmother， as well as the latter’s life and experiences are recounted。 From there， the author pondering about his role as a writer who must constantly defy and dismantle colonial tropes in literature; and about his ambivalent relationship with the motherland: ‘𝐼 𝑡ℎ𝑜𝑢𝑔ℎ𝑡 𝑎𝑏𝑜𝑢𝑡 𝑚𝑦 𝑜𝑤𝑛 𝑎𝑡𝑡𝑎𝑐ℎ𝑚𝑒𝑛𝑡 𝑡𝑜 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑀𝑎𝑙𝑎𝑦𝑠𝑖𝑎𝑛 𝑙𝑎𝑛𝑑𝑠𝑐𝑎𝑝𝑒 – 𝑡𝑜 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑀𝑎𝑙𝑎𝑦𝑠𝑖𝑎𝑛 𝑐𝑜𝑢𝑛𝑡𝑟𝑦。 𝐼 𝑤𝑎𝑠 𝑖𝑛 𝑚𝑦 𝑡𝑒𝑒𝑛𝑠 𝑤ℎ𝑒𝑛 𝐼 𝑙𝑒𝑎𝑟𝑛𝑒𝑑 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡， 𝑎𝑠 𝑒𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑖𝑐 𝐶ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑒𝑠𝑒 𝑐𝑖𝑡𝑖𝑧𝑒𝑛𝑠， 𝑤𝑒 𝑑𝑖𝑑 𝑛𝑜𝑡 ℎ𝑎𝑣𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑙𝑒𝑔𝑎𝑙 𝑟𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑡 𝑡𝑜 𝑜𝑤𝑛 𝑐𝑒𝑟𝑡𝑎𝑖𝑛 𝑘𝑖𝑛𝑑𝑠 𝑜𝑓 𝑙𝑎𝑛𝑑， 𝑣𝑎𝑠𝑡 𝑡𝑟𝑎𝑐𝑡𝑠 𝑜𝑓 𝑝𝑟𝑖𝑚𝑒 𝑓𝑜𝑟𝑒𝑠𝑡 𝑜𝑟 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑙 𝑒𝑠𝑡𝑎𝑡𝑒。 𝑊𝑟𝑜𝑛𝑔 𝑟𝑎𝑐𝑒， 𝑤𝑟𝑜𝑛𝑔 𝑟𝑒𝑙𝑖𝑔𝑖𝑜𝑛。 𝑊𝑒 𝑑𝑖𝑑𝑛’𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑘 𝑜𝑓 𝑜𝑢𝑟𝑠𝑒𝑙𝑣𝑒𝑠 𝑎𝑠 𝑖𝑚𝑚𝑖𝑔𝑟𝑎𝑛𝑡𝑠 – 𝑣𝑒𝑟𝑦 𝑓𝑒𝑤 𝑖𝑚𝑚𝑖𝑔𝑟𝑎𝑛𝑡𝑠 𝑑𝑜 – 𝑏𝑢𝑡 ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝑤𝑎𝑠 𝑎 𝑟𝑒𝑚𝑖𝑛𝑑𝑒𝑟。 𝑊𝑒 𝑐𝑜𝑢𝑙𝑑 𝑝𝑜𝑠𝑠𝑒𝑠𝑠 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑛𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛𝑎𝑙𝑖𝑡𝑦， 𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝑤𝑒 𝑐𝑜𝑢𝑙𝑑𝑛’𝑡 𝑓𝑢𝑙𝑙𝑦 𝑝𝑜𝑠𝑠𝑒𝑠𝑠 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑒𝑎𝑟𝑡ℎ。 𝑆𝑡𝑖𝑙𝑙， 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝑎𝑟𝑒 𝑙𝑎𝑤𝑠， 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝑖𝑠 𝑦𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑟𝑒𝑙𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛𝑠ℎ𝑖𝑝 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑡𝑎𝑛𝑎ℎ 𝑎𝑖𝑟， 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑠𝑜𝑖𝑙 𝑤𝑒 𝑠𝑡𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑜𝑛。’ In face racial and religious discrimination， forebears resort to silence， which is more than a way to avoid conflict or confrontation。 It is “a form of protection” and “an expression of love。” Their sacrifice and silence is for the sake of their descendants。 Their reticence is one that is full of words。Reading Aw’s book has reminded me of the stories I grew up listening to， which are part of my family history。 And here are some of them。 My paternal great-grandfather， who was a merchant， travelled with a shipload of goods only to have them robbed by a group of pirates。 Having lost the only fortune he owned， he spent the rest of his life feeling dejected and smoking opium。 My maternal great-grandfather fell sick in the early days of Japanese Occupation。 Eventually， he passed away and the family buried his body at night in a surreptitious manner， fearing of being found out by Japanese soldiers。 He was in his late 30s。 My maternal great-grandmother who， I assume， was born into a wealthy family and had her feet bound。 She walked in small steps and grew well into a considerable age。 They all came to Malaya all the way from the war-torn China with not much money but abundance of hope。 They were the strangers in the pier， anxious yet eager to find out what the future had in store for them in this new homeland。 Then， came my paternal and maternal grandparents。 Then， Pa and Ma。 And then， me and my siblings。 The descendants of the strangers on the pier。Back in the room on the 17th floor。 I sit at the desk， typing out these words， then staring out the window。 I see vehicles moving on the busy streets of Penang Island， smoke and dust fluttering around。 On that distant sea is a wooden ship。 Squinting my eyes， I try to make out the silhouette waving at me， seemingly enthusiastically。 Perhaps it is that great paternal grandfather of mine， who arrives in his new motherland with the reclaimed goods。 Perhaps。 Perhaps。 。。。more
Alison
，
More essay than book， Aw examines migration within the context of his own family's history。 The title is taken from his central fascination with these decisions by his grandparents: to arrive in a place in a place they knew nothing much of， encapsulated by that moment of standing， belongings in hand， on a pier， deciding at to do next。 The essay finds over generations， examining what it is to be descended from migrants as well as migration。 I grew up in Australia's era of Official Multicultural P More essay than book， Aw examines migration within the context of his own family's history。 The title is taken from his central fascination with these decisions by his grandparents: to arrive in a place in a place they knew nothing much of， encapsulated by that moment of standing， belongings in hand， on a pier， deciding at to do next。 The essay finds over generations， examining what it is to be descended from migrants as well as migration。 I grew up in Australia's era of Official Multicultural Policy， given me the absurd impression that Australia was uniquely multicultural in the region。 It is as I grew older that I have belatedly realised the entwining of cultures produced by Chinese， Filipino， Tamil and other Desi migrations have had throughout the region。 Aw's book is not designed to be educative for the ignorant， but it is a wonderful exploration of impact as lived by one family。 。。。more
Zhi Zhi
，
Tash Aw has deftly crafted a vulnerable， reflective， and honest portrait of what it is and feels like to be a Chinese-Malaysian。 An easily 5-star read。 I borrowed this book from a friend and I will be getting my own copy because I would want to revisit it again and again as I reflect on my experience as a Chinese-Malaysian。
Tessa Kerre
，
Dit is zonder twijfel de kortste familiekroniek die ik ooot las - maar hij blijft wel aan de ribben plakken。 In alle eenvoud en terloops legt Tash Aw pijnpunten bloot die recht naar je hart gaan en je doen denken。 En herinneren。
emily
，
'It wasn’t until some days later， back in London， that I thought about my own attachment to the Malaysian landscape – to the Malaysian country。 I was in my teens when I learned that， as ethnic Chinese citizens， we did not have the legal right to own certain kinds of land， vast tracts of prime forest or real estate。 Wrong race， wrong religion。 We didn’t think of ourselves as immigrants – very few immigrants do – but here was a reminder。 We could possess the nationality， but we couldn’t fully poss 'It wasn’t until some days later， back in London， that I thought about my own attachment to the Malaysian landscape – to the Malaysian country。 I was in my teens when I learned that， as ethnic Chinese citizens， we did not have the legal right to own certain kinds of land， vast tracts of prime forest or real estate。 Wrong race， wrong religion。 We didn’t think of ourselves as immigrants – very few immigrants do – but here was a reminder。 We could possess the nationality， but we couldn’t fully possess the earth。 Still， there are laws， and there is your relationship with the tanah air， the soil you stand on。' Enjoyed The Face: Strangers on a Pier （which is actually the first part of this book）， but the rest felt somewhat underdeveloped。 It may be because （I would like to think that） I'm familiar enough with the 'Malaysian' culture and whatnots， so this felt like a romanticised view of it somehow （and also slightly dated if I may add）。 If you're not though， you might enjoy this much more than I did。 Also， having read the second part of the book， I was left with a lingering thought of that it's easier to 'think' lovingly about people/places/things than actually loving them。 'You would draw solace from the Chinese expression chi ku， to eat bitterness， because to suffer is to be admired; that is how the underprivileged justify the harshness of their lives， by turning it into a virtue。 In time you’ll find yourself saying of someone: she’s had a hard life。 It sounds like pity， but is intended as a compliment。'While Aw gently but carelessly criticised （albeit without being aggressive/blatantly rude） the cultures 'foreign' to him， he seems to have （deliberately？） overlooked the flaws of the Malaysian Chinese culture（s） （and almost 'forgive' or at least disregard the bad bits too quickly）。 Since this is a very personal sort of writing， I do have to clarify that it's definitely not the writing that I thought was bad （which it isn't; on the contrary - it's rather brilliant）， but it was the 'content' that I found to be somewhat lacking。 I think I would have liked it more if Aw compared his 'childhood' experiences with his current living situation and/or lifestyle in presumably the UK。 I simply thought that this was overfilled with nostalgic sentiments。 The balance of views would have been lovely。 'Growing up in an ethnic Chinese family in Malaysia， I’d learnt what minorities everywhere absorb by instinct: you have to prove that you’re hardworking and valuable to society， but not so much that you become a threat， so you deflect attention away from yourself。 Self-deprecation was the key to your survival。''。。。one day the family received a call from Tanjung Rambutan， the infamous local psychiatric hospital， regarding a patient who was very sick。 He had no family and was found wandering the streets of Ipoh。 The only name he had was my grandfather’s。 Would he take him in？ There followed angry disputes at home， recounts my mother。 Don’t let that man come into this house， some members of the family argued， he will bring bad luck on us。 But my grandfather insisted。 It was his duty; he couldn’t abandon his childhood friend， even though they hadn’t been in touch for decades。' With that said though， I thought the first part was pretty much perfect， so I'd recommend reading it anyway。 I have too many complaints about the second half。 One of them also being how Aw introduced mental health/death/sexuality in it without exploring it further， which made me feel like - well what's even the point of doing that then （even so， I thought the bit where his grandma was being all excited about Prince's （the musician） performance on telly quite endearing） ？ Ironically this reminds me of Aw's reference to an editor's post （about how no one would be interested in grandmothers' shoes and their personal post-war experiences）。 All that the 'editor' wanted to leave out was all that I wanted more of in the book。The feeling of （mostly emotional） 'distance' （between the writer and his grandma） in that was too obvious to me。 But then again the feelings/views of emotional 'closeness' is a rather subjective thing， so maybe I'm just being too critical about it （because this complicated concept is essentially what Aw was trying to place/convey in the book anyway）。 Overall， a 3。5 rounded off to a 4。 'We stood in the kitchen laughing。 You gave me a glass of sweet barley water and said， Let’s go to Pusing tonight to eat noodles， I’ll treat you to your favourite Hokkien Mee。''You’re telling me these things because we have grown apart， and sometimes it’s easier to be intimate with a stranger。 Alone with you， in what we both know will be our last conversation， it strikes me that the story of our relationship is the story of separation。 Our closeness is measured in the distance between us。''This is the world I live in now。 I have come to equate knowing with living， and I want to live。 You have to tell me everything。 Time is slipping away from us。 Stay with me。' 。。。more
Olivia
，
4。5
Khai Jian （KJ）
，
"For our family and others like us， separation is an expression of love。 Not just in the physical sense， but in the way we think。 We want our children to have an education and a job， to experience life in the way we never could， knowing that everything they gain will make them more distant from us。 Loving someone means separating yourself from them。 The future is lived vicariously through their achievements: their lives must follow an upward trajectory。 They must not fail。 That is what social mo "For our family and others like us， separation is an expression of love。 Not just in the physical sense， but in the way we think。 We want our children to have an education and a job， to experience life in the way we never could， knowing that everything they gain will make them more distant from us。 Loving someone means separating yourself from them。 The future is lived vicariously through their achievements: their lives must follow an upward trajectory。 They must not fail。 That is what social mobility means in Asia today。"Strangers On A Pier is perhaps my first Tash Aw read and my third non-fiction read in my entire life。 It is a short memoir （about 90 pages） of Tash Aw's family which explores the cultural vitality of modern Asia， identity， memory， migration， adaptation， the notions of silence and blind acceptance in the Asian community， and familial love。。。all of which are captured beautifully by Tash Aw in this slim yet powerful book。 I am unable to pen down a proper review for this as I am still in awe of what Tash Aw has written herein。 It is full of raw emotions， it is relatable and definitely a must-read for everyone who once felt that they are strangers on a pier。 Without a doubt， a 5/5 star read and I will be sharing some impactful quotes here。 "People rarely think of themselves as immigrants。 That is something others describe you as。""Maybe it isn’t to do with our faces， but with our wish for everyone to be like us。 We want the stranger to be one of our own， someone we can understand。""Growing up in an ethnic Chinese family in Malaysia， I'd learnt what minorities everywhere absorb by instinct: you have to prove that you're hardworking and valuable to society， but not so much that you become a threat， so you deflect attention away from yourself。 Self-deprecation was the key to your survival""And in the silence， I began to think: that's what frustrates me about a particular kind of migrant， the ones who drop their cultural baggage entirely in order to assimilate successfully into their new surroundings （as opposed to the other extreme， who cling desperately to memories of the homeland， and can't wait for the day they can retire and return to the place they have just left）。 For the problem of the Forgetters is that the need to wipe the slate clean in their adoptive country doesn't just begin and end with their arrival in their new land; it continues thereafter， repeating itself until it finds a convenient historical ground zero that is emotionally and intellectually untroubled， so that a new narrative about themselves is formed。。。" "We can't live， comfortably or uncomfortably， with the knowledge that our story was narrated by someone else during those long early chapters， so we edit those passages out。 But， as any storyteller knows， the editing process is addictive - buried in the mess there is a perfect story waiting to emerge - so we chisel away obsessively， chipping off entire blocks from the structure， more and more and more， until finally we have an unblemished， featureless mass。 This is the form that pleases us。""In those moments， I knew that your denial of the insult was a form of protection; your silence was an expression of love"。 。。。more
Elie
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screaming crying throwing up
Eline
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Tash Aw vertelt in ‘Vreemdelingen op een kade’ in een notendop de migratiegeschiedenis van zijn familie。 Zijn beide grootvaders verlieten China in de jaren twintig van de vorige eeuw， op zoek naar een beter leven in Maleisië。 Vooral het tweede deel van het boekje vind ik hartverscheurend mooi。 Het is een ode aan Aw’s grootmoeder die in Kuala Lumpur woonde en bij wie hij als kind veel logeerde。 Aw bezoekt haar met zijn ouders aan het eind van haar leven， als ze stervend is。 ‘We dachten dat we je Tash Aw vertelt in ‘Vreemdelingen op een kade’ in een notendop de migratiegeschiedenis van zijn familie。 Zijn beide grootvaders verlieten China in de jaren twintig van de vorige eeuw， op zoek naar een beter leven in Maleisië。 Vooral het tweede deel van het boekje vind ik hartverscheurend mooi。 Het is een ode aan Aw’s grootmoeder die in Kuala Lumpur woonde en bij wie hij als kind veel logeerde。 Aw bezoekt haar met zijn ouders aan het eind van haar leven， als ze stervend is。 ‘We dachten dat we je daar dood zouden aantreffen， maar in plaats daarvan zit je naast me， levendiger dan ooit。’ Mooi hoe hij haar verhaal direct aan haar richt， door dit in de je-vorm te schrijven。 ‘Niemand weet precies in welk jaar je bent geboren， of waar。 We weten alleen dat je uit een afgelegen gehucht komt， een groepje oude huizen， ergens diep in het oerwoud。’In een ruk heb ik het boek uitgelezen。 Ik wens iedereen deze bijzondere leeservaring toe！ 。。。more
Kathy
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Vanaf de eerste pagina's besef je dat je met dit boekje een zeldzaam pareltje in je handen hebt。 Aw， een jonge vijftiger die opgroeide en Kuala Lumpur en tegenwoordig in Parijs woont， vertelt het migratieverhaal van zijn familie en doet dit door terug te keren naar de verhalen zijn zijn grootvaders。 Die ontvluchtten als jonge mannen beiden de uitzichtloze armoede en honger in China en vestigden zich in het groenere en vruchtbaardere Maleisië。 Als kind ontdekte Aw stukje bij beetje hoe het verhaa Vanaf de eerste pagina's besef je dat je met dit boekje een zeldzaam pareltje in je handen hebt。 Aw， een jonge vijftiger die opgroeide en Kuala Lumpur en tegenwoordig in Parijs woont， vertelt het migratieverhaal van zijn familie en doet dit door terug te keren naar de verhalen zijn zijn grootvaders。 Die ontvluchtten als jonge mannen beiden de uitzichtloze armoede en honger in China en vestigden zich in het groenere en vruchtbaardere Maleisië。 Als kind ontdekte Aw stukje bij beetje hoe het verhaal van zijn grootvaders zijn eigen verhaal en dat zijn generatiegenoten blijvend beïnvloedt。 Aw vertelt de kleine verhalen， over zwijgende verdriet， over je lot in stilte dragen over nergens thuishoren。 Over overal een vreemdeling zijn en blijven。 。。。more
Michel Schynkel
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Interessant boek voor wie graag wat meer inzicht krijgt in migratie en wat de effecten daarvan zijn op verschillende generaties。 Het doet vooral beseffen dat migratie een systemisch gegeven is en vandaar van alle tijden。 Daarnaast zoemt Tash Aw ook in op de effecten die het heeft op het individu， o。a。 via een liefdevol portret van zijn grootmoeder。 Bij momenten behoorlijk aangrijpend egodocument。
☃️ Quirk
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Great book！ Really explored the ideas of ancestry influencing lived experience and the thoughts that go along with questioning your ancestry + upbringing。 Also to be honest， read this book recovering from shoulder surgery， so was on multiple pain meds :）1。 Education/test results are used incredibly aggressively as a proxy for "potential"， especially in Southeast Asia。 Education is one of the most expensive goods in our society because of its potential to give an individual so much status。2。 Chin Great book！ Really explored the ideas of ancestry influencing lived experience and the thoughts that go along with questioning your ancestry + upbringing。 Also to be honest， read this book recovering from shoulder surgery， so was on multiple pain meds :）1。 Education/test results are used incredibly aggressively as a proxy for "potential"， especially in Southeast Asia。 Education is one of the most expensive goods in our society because of its potential to give an individual so much status。2。 China is anything but homogenous when it comes to cultural perspectives。3。 British prep/top schools can be stifling 。。。more
Simon Haisell
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𝗦𝗵𝗮𝗽𝗲𝘀 𝗼𝗳 𝗦𝗶𝗹𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲Books are where strangers meet。Writer and reader on the page。 Neither knows the journey that brought them。 The countless drafts thrown away， the sleepless nights and wondering walks。Each reader finds their own way。I listened twice to Strangers on a Pier by the Chinese Malaysian writer Tash Aw。 The memoir is 96 pages with nothing wasted。 It's beautiful， wise， sincere。 It reminds me of Orwell's exhortation that "good prose is like a windowpane。" In reading it， everything is illumi 𝗦𝗵𝗮𝗽𝗲𝘀 𝗼𝗳 𝗦𝗶𝗹𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲Books are where strangers meet。Writer and reader on the page。 Neither knows the journey that brought them。 The countless drafts thrown away， the sleepless nights and wondering walks。Each reader finds their own way。I listened twice to Strangers on a Pier by the Chinese Malaysian writer Tash Aw。 The memoir is 96 pages with nothing wasted。 It's beautiful， wise， sincere。 It reminds me of Orwell's exhortation that "good prose is like a windowpane。" In reading it， everything is illuminated。Aw writes with a generous openness。 Each page， an invitation to think。 Conversations blossom， awkward， comforting， necessary。Many will recognise conversations they had with relatives。 Or wish they had， but never did。However， I kept thinking about how strange and different his family story is from my own。When official forms ask my ethnicity I find a box on the first row: White British。When I travel， I am occasionally mistaken for an American。 But mostly， my face needs little elaboration。My grandparents were born in England。 Our ancestors dodged plague， tilled fields， survived dark satanic mills。Somewhere along the way， a stranger lent us a cumbersome Roman nose。 Another entwined red into mousy hair。 A wisp of Viking？There will be other surprises curled up in our past。 Love， toil， secrets， lies。 There always are。But mostly there is cosy indifference。 A careless forgetfulness。A comfortable silence。 It shrouds who we are and where we come from。 We shrug and say: we are English。 Let others worry about such things。Addressing his grandmother， Aw writes he is tired of dragging around "this story that is mine"， the poor suffering Asian。He wishes for a history rooted in a timeless bucolic hamlet， where people set out on adventures and always come back home。"But that is not what I have。 I have you。 You are my history， you are my past and my present。 And I will talk about you。"Driven by a desire to know and to tell his family's story， Aw describes the edges of the silences in his family history。First they take the shape of shame。 But when the form is made whole and the edges complete， he finds a silence with the shape of love。In conversation with Deborah Levy， Tash Aw says he writes about the shape of silence。In this book， he is talking to his dying grandmother:"I have come to equate knowing with living and I want to live。 You have to tell me everything。 Time is slipping away from us。 Stay with me。"His grandparents were born in China and migrated to British Malaya。 Strangers on a pier， they made new lives in a strange land。Those were momentous times。 The country they left was going to change beyond recognition。 The empire they settled in would disappear。 An independent Malaysia emerged from all this and became their home。 Although not everyone would accept them。Aw's parents and grandparents do not speak of this past。 When Aw asks fellow Malaysians who their great-grandparents were， they reply:We don't know。In Elizabeth Wong's novel We Could Not See The Stars， extraterrestrial migrants settle in a fantastical version of Malaysia。 When they stray into the jungle， they lose their memories and forget their ancestors。Tash Aw explores not just his family's past， but the nature of forgetting。 The shape of silence。His mother says their lives weren't interesting。 His father says it was the shame of being poor。Parents worked hard， dreaming their children would not know hunger or back-breaking labour。And that dream meant grandparents made strangers of their grandchildren。 So the measure of their success would be how little they had in common。It also created a country of strangers。 The dream came true for some， but not for others。 Aw writes of how his generation grew apart。 And this book is a love letter to those classmates whose lives were separated by education， wealth and damn luck。Silence as shame and separation。But also love。 The book ends with a letter to his grandmother。 His love for her and his family rises from each word。 As does her love for him。 To protect him from what she knew and what she saw。Amidst the need to know and to love， to tell and to listen， Aw finds a line from King Lear:Love， and be silent。He understands instinctively。Except his autocorrect keeps changing it to:Live， and be silent。"And I want to live。" 。。。more
Vidya
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